Since we did a lot of driving today, my husband and I had time to talk.
Well, we talked about what makes a man… manly.
Maybe it was my son and how he did not mind watching Barbie Charm School twice on the trip today. By the way, he actually does like the movie… he even will tell you his favorite part, if you were to ask.
Does that make my son unmanly? If it does, is that so bad? Is it OK to be unmanly? Or… Is it better to be an unmanly man. I certainly would not have wanted to marry a manly man… in fact I told him that…
Me: I don’t think you are that manly, and that is fine.
My husband: [laughed, but trying to appear offended] What?
Me: What? [trying to dig myself out of he hole I just fell into] That is not a bad thing. You are a metrosexual.
My husband: Really?
Me: What? All I am saying is if there was a picture next to the words “manly man” it would not be you. It is not a bad thing. Manly men are unkempt and wear bad clothes. They love sports A LOT! They shoot things. You do not shoot things.
My husband: [trying to ignore me]
Me: Seriously, would you consider yourself a manly man?
My husband: [glaring]
I can’t remember how we got off the subject, but thankfully we did.
I realize now that I should be thankful that he did not throw me out of the car, which is further evidence that he is a better man than most men.
You see, I realized that for me… being a manly man is not a good thing. It is scratching your crotch and shooting things. It is wearing bad clothes and being unkempt. I envision cave men… or the modern day equivalent.
It made me wonder, do I have it wrong.
Apparently, I do because I found this post.
I will start with a Manly Definition of the word MANLY: Manly: It is being awesome, being Strong, Big and knowing that your bare knuckles are the greatest thing in the world, It is also a lovely beach in Australia.
We are a Bunch of Bros, kicking ass, chewin gum and takin names.
Apparently…manliness is being awesome, strong, and you punch things. Oh, and you chew gum.
Is it just me or does this sound like satire?
Who cares if a guy is strong, has a 6-pack, and chews gum? At the end of the day, it does not make him a better husband or father. Wait! Let me check that definition again. No, nothing there about being a good husband or father… apparently it is Bros before Hos.
Well, just in case that is not the correct definition… I went to Urban Dictionary.
What I want to know is how do they know what soap George Clooney and Paul Newman use?
He forgot that a manly man is overly arrogant.
Seriously? Manly men don’t know the difference between “you’re” and “your”, obviously. They also forget to capitalize I’s and don’t know how to use apostrophes and commas. (I know that is calling the kettle black, but I had comment on that).
What I determined is that in essence being a “manly man” means that you are essentially a schmuck. It is a source of humor, rather than something to aspire too. Real men are not “manly men.” They can’t be… no man can live up to the definitions.
If being manly is being awesome… then being manly means holding your girl’s purse, or picking up the tampons at the store (because it is on the grocery list).
If being manly is being comfortable in your own skin, then it means not caring if someone else thinks you are manly. It means that you don’t care if the world knows you like Barbie movies.
If I follow these definitions…
I owe my husband an apology.
He is the most manly guy on earth, because he is a male human of exceptional strength, fortitude, brilliance, and overall awesomeness. My son is also pretty manly… because he is pretty awesome as well.