Disclosure: If you are easily offended by bathroom humor, this may be a post to skip.
It is no secret, but Thai food does not agree with me (you can use your imagination on what I mean by that). Funny thing is when I was out to dinner at a Thai restaurant with my friends tonight we were swapping stories of times where we made inconvenient pit stops due to incompatibility of our bodies with this yummy type of food. Little did I know that I would have a new story that pretty much would blow the story I told out of the water.
Here is the new story I would have told if the dinner was tomorrow night and not tonight.
One time I was one my way home and my stomach started protesting the yummy lettuce wraps I had at dinner. Now, I was about a mile away so I thought I could make it home with no problem so I did not worry. I pulled into the driveway and made a run for the door. As I jumped around a bit looking for my keys, I noticed that their was something guarding the door.
In the darkness, it was menacing. It kind of looked like a bee… actually I now know it was a wasp (thanks google images). Anyways, it was not going anywhere. At that moment, I knew that an epic battle was about to ensue…. My fear of bees and wasps vs. my body’s hatred for Thai Food. I thought about running to the back of the house (Fear wins!), but something told me that I needed to conquer my fear. Alas, I closed my eyes and prayed that my husband did not lock the front door because there was no way I was going to spend time messing with the lock. Thankfully, the door opened I ran into the house like I was being chased by a mad dog and ran to the bathroom. The Husband aroused by the commotion ran to the foyer expecting a gunman or like type of criminal. When all he saw was me in the bathroom he looked at me with surprise.
Husband: “What the hell is going on?”
Me: “There is a big ugly bug out there and it was it vs. the Thai food.”
Husband: “I think the Bug won!”
Me: “It was a close one! I had time to get a picture though! You should go look! (handing him the phone) I basically ran in and I don’t think he followed me.”
My husband just shook his head. What else can you do when your wife comes running into the house, slamming doors, and showing you a picture of a bug that supposedly was conspiring to keep her from a bathroom?
Additional note: The picture shown was taken after the conversation with my husband. The iphone picture was not a very good one and I thought you wanted to see the Big Ugly Bug with more detail. Of course, I was still scared of him so I did not want to take my chances pissing him off my completely shutting the door.
Another Additional note: Irritable Bowel Syndrome is just another great way my body changed after having kids. I can can make light of it, but it really is not the greatest thing in the world to have. For more information on IBS try this link